A client once arrived at my virtual door, heavy with indecision.
He’d been in the same job for over 20 years. Stable. Predictable. Secure. He knew what to expect. Promotions, salary increments, structure.
And yet, inside him stirred something else; a dream. A calling. A whisper to step into uncharted territory: to become an entrepreneur.
One path offered certainty. The other, nothing but possibility, doubt, and risk.
He paced between:
- “Is it better to stay, or leap?”
- “What if I regret it?”
- “Will I look foolish if it fails?”
In that coaching space, I remained silent. Present. Curious. Holding open questions more than answers.
I asked him:
- What is igniting this longing now?
- What does “important” look like to you?
- Who are you underneath all these roles and expectations?
His introspection surprised even him.
After a long silence, he said: “Vinita, this might sound emotional, not rational … but I’ll tell you anyway. Have you ever seen a pregnant woman suddenly crave a very specific ice cream?
The smell, the first bite: it’s not logical, but it’s deeply right. That’s how this choice feels. I can’t reduce it to numbers. But it feels necessary for what I carry inside me.”
Goosebumps.
This is what true coaching can unlock. Not prescriptions, not judgments. Just spaciousness. Allowing what is buried…often under years of logic, programming, external expectations to surface.
In coaching:
- No “You should…”
- No “That’s unrealistic…”
- No “Are you certain this makes sense?”
It’s not about what’s objectively “right.” It’s about what’s appropriate for you.
Because that answer when you reach it, is personal. Sacred. Sometimes hidden behind layers of persona, survival, identity. If you’re standing at a crossroad, ask yourself:
Is this decision logical?
Or is it appropriate for who I am becoming?
One guides you to your home.
Why “Appropriate” Matters More Than “Right”
When we lean solely into logic, we risk ignoring the inner voice…the whisper of your deeper truth. Logic is vital, yes, but incomplete. It maps the terrain; it doesn’t chart your soul’s path.
True alignment arises when your head and heart move in conversation.
What feels “appropriate” carries dimension:
- Resonance — a body-level yes
- Timing — in sync with your life season
- Integrity — aligned with your values
- Belonging — sweet surrender to who you are
That pregnant-woman–ice-cream image is just one metaphor. Yours may be very different. A color that draws you. A recurring dream. A memory that tugs at your gut.
In the silence of coaching, metaphors emerge. Emotions rise. You meet yourself.
It’s not always comfortable. You might feel grief, fear, longing. But it’s real. It’s permission. It’s birth.
How to Hold This Space for Yourself
You don’t need a coach to begin this inner work. You can start with small practices:
- Journal with curiosity
Ask: “What do I feel when I imagine each choice?” Don’t argue, listen. - Sit with metaphors
What images or sensations arise when you contemplate staying vs leaping? What do they want to tell you? - Feel the body’s yes or no
Breathe. Relax. Notice tension or ease. The body is wise. - Suspend external voices
For a moment, let go of “What will people say?” The path is yours to walk. - Speak it out loud
Say both options. Feel their weight. Which one resonates deeper? - Test small steps
You don’t have to jump in fully. Try a pilot. Experiment. See what feels aligned.
When Coaching Makes the Difference
In a coaching container, you receive:
- Permission to explore in safety
- Gentle guidance, not answers
- Questions that cut through noise
- Space to slow, sense, clarify
- A mirror to see what was hidden
What emerges is not a checklist decision. It’s a felt truth. And that becomes a compass.
If you, too, are caught in tension, torn between the known and the unknown…I invite you to pause. Breathe. Speak honestly. Dive deeper than your mind wants to go.
There is no universal formula. No objective “right.” Only what is appropriate…for you in this moment, for the next version of you waiting to emerge.